10 Tips for Grooms (from a Groom)

As a wedding photographer and recent bride, I’ve found that most advice + tips is geared toward brides. Obviously that makes the most sense, as brides are typically at the forefront of planning, meeting, designing, etc. When thinking about what to blog this week, I thought it might be fun to have a post from a groom’s perspective. With all of the craziness of wedding planning, I can’t help but wonder what’s playing through the groom’s mind and/or how they like to play a role. Now, every groom is different, just as every bride is different. Some like to be hands on, and some would rather let his bride dream and plan away. I mean, he did have a lot of planning + stress with the proposal and all 🙂

During our whole planning process, Jeremy played the perfect role in helping me make decisions, but also letting me run with ideas. He helped me soak and paint bottles upon bottles for our centerpieces, and he was behind every designed piece of our wedding (our wedding website, our invitations, programs, the list goes on). Jeremy really put his graphic design talents to use throughout our wedding, and I can’t imagine what we would have done without that!

I am so thankful for his help in those details, yet the biggest role Jeremy played was the level-headed man that helped me set boundaries. Personally, I think that is one of the biggest roles the groom can play. When I got caught in the details or stressed too much, Jeremy was right there to bring me back to what it’s all about–many grooms are that sense of peace in the planning. They help us to settle down, make decisions and remind us it’s about the marriage, not the wedding.

So, today I bring you 10 Tips for Grooms from a groom’s perspective (my groom!). Jeremy was kind enough sit down and think through our wedding +  planning process to provide some feedback for all of the couples currently planning their big day. I asked him to give a little advice for the grooms out there and it was pretty eye-opening to see what he came up with. The tips may be geared toward the grooms, but ladies, I think it’s good advice for all of us!

1. Keep things in perspective: remember everything comes down to the moment when you say, “I do” everything else just simply isn’t  as important.

2. Accept that something will wrong: take a deep breath and let it sink it, there is a 100% chance that something will not go as planned, but that’s what makes memories. Weddings are 2 imperfect people joining together in God’s perfect love, so we were meant to be the imperfect ones.

3. Have a good sense of humor:  being able to laugh off the stress of weddings is key. Have fun with it, you only get 1 wedding day.

4. It’s all about the people:  you know those get togethers where you know like 2 people (one of those is the friend you came with), your wedding day is the opposite of that, and it’s awesome.

5. Pick one moment, and be present: a friend once told me, “This will be the only time in your life where you’ll know everyone in the crowd…” as hard as it may be, pick 1 moment to really just be fully present in.

6. Let no one take away from your dream wedding: your wedding is just that, your wedding. Don’t let anyone take away from that.

7. Don’t be afraid to ask for help: don’t be afraid to gather your groomsmen, family, friends, and put them to work. More than likely, they’ll be pumped to help.

8. Be involved in the details: you’ll hear people say, “It’s her day…” and that is mostly true, but you’re definitely more than a bowtie. Be as involved as you can in the details, you’ll probably enjoy it more than you think you would.

9. Pay attention to advice, you’ll get a lot:  unless it’s your 4-time divorcee uncle, the people that will give you advice, have been there and done that, and there advice is awesome.

10. Plan more for your marriage than your wedding: a wedding is one day, a marriage is for life. Spend more time thinking about the lifetime after that day than the details everyone will forget next month.

So there you have it, some tips from a groom himself. To all the grooms out there–thank you so much for being such great support throughout the process. No matter if you’re planning an intimate ceremony or a huge party, there are plenty of opinions, details and to-dos. It can all be overwhelming at times, but remembering what it’s all about makes it all worth it. The wedding day is a lot of work, but it’ll be your first day as husband + wife. You couldn’t ask for more!